A Mayflower's Musings

Wednesday, June 29, 2011

S.L.O.W.I.N.G....down

How do you SLOW down when there's still so much to be done, and your kids and your social life is used to FAST...and yet..your body is saying STOP?!

I have SO much to blog about, and a few cute pictures to share...but mostly the pictures are in my head, because I haven't done a lot of permanent capturing. It's all in here (I'm pointing to my head and heart right now).

And yet I am really tired these days. I keep trying to tackle huge to do lists so that I can rest, but maybe that will never happen because I can't seem to get through the lists before a new list starts. But some things are behind me, like school days (for awhile), moms group (for awhile), and a recent big garage sale undertaking.ou

If I was brave enough I would ask everyone who was attending a baby shower for me, to instead come help me plow through piles here. BUT then again...please don't show up at my door, cause I never would honestly let you IN.

Mike and Daphne are gone for a week and I am doing the single parent show. I don't know how women out there do it - seriously! By the time we get to bed time, I can almost taste the freedom and it is so needed that I get really cranky. Although, I have suffered through crankiness in the late afternoon in hopes of wearing them out for an early bedtime - that rarely works here. Even yesterday they were BEAT, and I laid them down at 7pm..but don't think the last one retired til 8:15pm.

M got up to go potty, to fix her special tent (I was sitting in the hallway playing policewoman), get new books, and lastly to come downstairs, once she realized I was gone to say she was scared and I forgot her song. I was so frustrated that I snapped a lot and I'm not good at always keeping my thoughts in my head. I went up and sang the saddest fastest rendition of Amazing Grace (which felt horrible to ruin that song!) and then came downstairs.

Then GUILT...so I packed up my weary body one more time up the stairs to apologize and she was already asleep. So I woke her up and said, "I'm sorry I was so grumpy honey. I am just SO tired but it was wrong. I love you". She gave me a big neck hug and a sleepy, "That's okay mommy. Now I have to get my rest - I'm so tired". Those were her exact words.

And all was well in the world again.

I'm so glad my kids are so forgiving, because I'm not the mom I want to be right now.

4 comments:

KLB said...

I have to say I am right there with ya! I have been so impatient with my husband and my poor daughter. I want to cry all the time and feel like I just can't take it any more. I really don't feel like myself. I am really looking forward to having this baby and hopefully my hormones will return to normal, or semi-normal LOL! Just remember you're not alone. Our bodies are going through so much right now. And being diabetic doesn't help.

Candi said...

Be kind to yourself, and give yourself a break! You have a very full plate, and you're always doing something for everyone else. Summers can be so chaotic with active little ones, so I know how you're feeling. I can come up to help you - would you let me in???

Jennifer Nice said...

We've all been there. Thanks for putting it so eloquently.

Jennifer Nice said...

We've all been there! Thanks for putting it so eloquently.